Ode to my Left Hand

My life has got quite tricky.
I’ve just one arm to use.
The other is quite useless.
Asked, ‘Can you . . .   ?’ I refuse!

I’m typing with one finger.
Four others are on strike.
They’ve come out in sympathy,
With the five I’ve on my right.

There are so many things, I find,
It’s difficult to do.
I can’t zip, peel spuds or style my hair.
No biggy there, it’s true.

My dresser/sous chef has stepped in
And I can wear a hat,
Cause he won’t learn hairdressing,
And I can tell you that . . .

It’s hard to clap one-handed,
Or tie a knot or bow,
Or spread on some hand lotion
Or skip rope, don’t you know.

I cannot put my watch on
My left arm any more.
I cannot put it on my right,
Because it is too sore.

To brush my teeth is difficult.
Two hands are a must,
To squeeze the tube and paste the brush,
Is really quite a fuss.

I’ve been practicing you see.
My right hand is redundant.
My left hand has come up trumps,
Though it was not incumbent.

My left hand is first team now,
My right is second squad
It sits around and whines a lot,
And refuses to applaud.

I shall be ambidextrous
When all of this is through
My left hand is quite nimble now
My right hand says ‘thank you!’

I’m feeling slightly better now,
Than when I wrote this ditty.
I am no longer shouting ‘OW!’
Like when I was feeling . . . . . . . . lousy!

There’s an upside to being frail.
I’m waited on hand and feet.
It’s like living in a fairytale.
This Princess says, ‘That’s sweet!’

65 thoughts on “Ode to my Left Hand

    1. It took my mind off it. 😦 You don’t suppose I mistakenly unfollowed you do you? My left thumb can get a bit unruly on this little phone screen. I’ve been liking my own posts and deleting comments by mistake!

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  1. What a great poem! And I am glad to hear you are feeling better. I think you are doing great with left hand only, you’ll be a pro after this:)

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  2. Impossible not to like your poem though I winced at the injury 🙂 In awe of your one fingered left handed dedication and your sunny disposition.
    How did you do it? I was going to say ‘spill the beans’ but thought that might be tactless 😦

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    1. Well . . . . if you really want to know . . . it’s not an injury. The end of the ulna had deteriorated and was tearing the tendon. The surgeon removed the end of the bone and reattached everything. I have decided I’m never ever having another operation. I’m a bad patient. Why are we called patients? I’m not patient.

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    1. He still has to eat and I ain’t cookin’! I boiled some frozen peas tonight. Took some clothes off the washing line. They mostly fell in the basket. I feel I’m coming on quite well. 😉

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  3. You made me think of the months right after having a stroke. My left hand (I am a lefty) showed the results of the stroke, wouldn’t clap, wouldn’t carry things, and FORGET doing the hair… I’m grateful to say it’s back to about 98% now, and I’m pretty sure your left hand will come along, as well. Thanks for the post! 🙂

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      1. It was healed from being prayed for, mostly, but I did do some exercises, too. And I’m glad you feel better! Sometimes other people’s hardships help to put mine into perspective. 🙂

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    1. Not always. When you say a bit . . . .
      Still, I will probably never get this level of service again so need to make the most of it.
      Himself is bringing fish and chips home for dinner tonight. I’ll think of you and how much you were taken with mushy peas when you were here!

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